I've always been hesitant to call myself a feminist- I believe we should all have equal opportunities but I don't like the extreme views that are associated with the term feminist. Lately I've been reading a lot of articles my feminist acquaintances have posted on facebook and I've been getting more and more annoyed with the message they're promoting. Tonight I read this article entitled 'Don't call me beautiful' and it put me over the edge and I feel like I need to talk about this.
A lot of the time, guys tell me I'm 'hot'. As soon as a guy calls me hot I automatically assume that he has no intention of getting to know me as a person and he's just interested in my looks. But I distinctly remember the first time a guy I liked called me beautiful and it made me so happy and filled me with so much confidence because I don't think the term beautiful just refers to looks. Being called beautiful is something very rare for me and I enjoy it because it makes me happy every single time. It doesn't make me feel like I'm being judged only by my looks and I would much rather have someone tell me that I looked beautiful than that I looked 'vivacious tonight' or I was 'full of energy'.
Another article I read was saying how you shouldn't compliment a girl on losing weight because it promotes an unhealthy body image. I'm sorry but that's bullshit (pardon my french). We seem to have developed this new form of sizeism where being overweight is a good thing and you shouldn't change it. I'm not saying that people who are overweight aren't beautiful and I know it's hard to lose weight (believe me, I've been there), but we should promote a health, and being obese is not healthy. If you're above 'normal weight' but you eat healthily and exercise and you are just built that way then that's totally fine, but so many people use being 'curvy' as an excuse. We should promote a healthy body image, we shouldn't shame people for being naturally skinny or naturally big, but we also shouldn't pretend that obesity is something to be proud of. I personally am very flattered when someone points out that I have lost weight and I would certainly not like people to tell me 'you just seem so YOU tonight' instead, like the article I read suggested.
Anyway, I sort of strayed away from my point and went off on a tangent there... What I want to say is that being called beautiful isn't a bad thing. If you're a guy, don't stop calling women beautiful because you think they will be offended by it. Being called beautiful doesn't mean you're being objectified, it's just a nice compliment and I think we seriously need to stop overanalysing these things and just let it be. Talk about more pressing issues like the pay gap between men and women and leave chivalry alone.